How to Be More Present in Everyday Moments

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I didn’t realize how often I was half somewhere else until one morning, I found myself stirring my coffee while scrolling through my email, half-listening to a podcast, and mentally planning dinner — all before 8 a.m.
By the time I actually sat down to drink it, my coffee was cold. I’d missed the quiet, the smell, the small comfort of the morning.
That was when it hit me: it wasn’t that I was unhappy. I just wasn’t there. My body was doing one thing while my brain sprinted three miles ahead.
Presence sounds simple, but in a world that rewards multitasking and constant motion, it’s one of the hardest things to hold onto.
Here’s what I’ve learned about slowing down enough to actually live in the moments that make up your day.
1. Recognize That Presence Isn’t “Doing Nothing”
For the longest time, I equated mindfulness with stillness — like I had to meditate or sit in silence for an hour to count as “being present.”
But mindfulness isn’t about what you’re doing. It’s about how you’re doing it.
- It’s sipping coffee without refreshing your inbox.
- It’s noticing the sound of your footsteps on the pavement.
- It’s cooking dinner and actually tasting it instead of inhaling it between tasks.
Neuroscientists say mindfulness strengthens the prefrontal cortex — the part of your brain responsible for focus and emotional regulation — and reduces activity in the default mode network, the area linked to rumination and anxiety.
Translation: presence literally rewires your brain to feel calmer and more focused.
So no, you don’t need a monastery. You just need to stop trying to be everywhere at once.
2. Start With Sensory Anchors
One of the simplest ways to come back to the present is to drop into your senses.
Our bodies are always here; it’s our minds that wander. By tuning into what you see, hear, smell, taste, or touch, you pull your awareness out of the spiral and into the moment.
I started creating small “sensory rituals” throughout my day — like diffusing lavender oil when I sit down to write. The scent has become my cue: this is my moment to pause and breathe.
This Essential Oil Diffuser has become one of my favorite mindfulness tools because it turns the air around me into a gentle reminder to slow down. I keep it on my desk with lavender or eucalyptus essential oil, and it instantly resets the mood of the room (and my brain).
This isn’t about creating a “perfect vibe.” It’s about teaching your senses how to find calm. Over time, your body starts to recognize these small cues as signals to come back to the present.
3. Reclaim Small Pauses
We tend to think presence requires carving out hours of free time — but it actually lives in micro-moments.
You can find it while waiting for water to boil, brushing your teeth, or walking to your car.
Instead of filling every pause with your phone, try using those gaps as mini-reset points:
- Take one slow, deep breath.
- Notice three things around you.
- Feel your feet on the ground.
That’s it. It sounds small, but repetition rewires habits. The more often you practice coming back, the easier it gets.
Psychologists call this habit stacking — linking a new behavior (presence) to something you already do. Over time, those micro-moments become anchors that bring your attention home.
4. Be Curious, Not Judgmental
When I first tried mindfulness, I’d catch myself drifting and instantly get frustrated. You’re doing it wrong, I’d think.
But that’s the opposite of mindfulness.
Presence isn’t about perfection — it’s about awareness.
Your mind will wander. That’s what minds do. The practice is noticing when it happens and gently bringing it back.
If you can approach that process with curiosity instead of judgment — “Huh, I’m distracted” instead of “I’m terrible at this” — you train your brain to self-correct without shame.
Research shows that self-compassion actually improves attention and emotional regulation.
5. Relearn How to Single-Task
Somewhere along the line, we were taught that multitasking equals efficiency. It doesn’t. It’s actually the opposite.
Every time you switch tasks, your brain has to reorient — a phenomenon known as context switching, which can eat up as much as 40% of your productive time.
I didn’t realize how much mental clutter I was creating until I started single-tasking again.
Now, I do one thing at a time: one email thread, one conversation, one household task.
It feels slower, but it’s actually faster — because I’m not constantly reloading my attention.
Try this experiment: For one day, don’t multitask. Not even with “harmless” things like texting while watching TV. Just notice how different your brain feels by evening.
6. Make Mindfulness a Habit, Not a Hobby
A lot of people think mindfulness is something you add to your day. But it’s more sustainable when it becomes the way you do your day.
You don’t need to sit on a cushion or chant (unless you want to). You can practice mindfulness while:
- Washing dishes — feel the warm water, hear the sounds.
- Driving — notice your hands on the wheel, your breathing.
- Talking to someone — focus on their tone, not your reply.
It’s like training your brain to live in real time instead of playing mental ping-pong between the past and future.
One book that really helped me understand this is The Things You Can See Only When You Slow Down by Haemin Sunim. It’s gentle but practical — full of small reminders that mindfulness isn’t about escaping the world; it’s about being awake to it.
The best part? You don’t have to “find time” for mindfulness. You just bring it to what you’re already doing.
7. Use Technology Intentionally
It’s easy to blame our phones for distraction — and yes, constant notifications do make presence harder. But the real issue isn’t the device; it’s how we use it.
Now, I set boundaries that help me stay grounded instead of reactive:
- I check messages twice a day, not constantly.
- I put my phone on “Do Not Disturb” during meals.
- I turn off nonessential notifications (you really don’t need breaking news updates at 11 p.m.).
Technology can serve mindfulness too — think guided meditations, white noise apps, even slow playlists. The goal isn’t to quit your phone; it’s to use it on purpose.
8. Slow Down Your Transitions
Most of us rush through the “in-betweens” — the moments between tasks, places, or conversations.
But those transitions are powerful chances to reset your nervous system.
Before I switch from work to dinner, I pause — close my laptop, stretch, take a few breaths, maybe diffuse a new scent.
It sounds small, but it tells my body: that chapter is done; you’re here now.
The brain thrives on ritual. When you mark transitions with small cues, you train it to shift states smoothly instead of carrying mental residue from one thing to the next.
9. Remember: Mindfulness Isn’t Always Calm
Here’s something I wish someone had told me sooner: being present doesn’t always feel peaceful.
Sometimes presence means sitting with discomfort instead of numbing it. It means feeling the full weight of boredom, sadness, or restlessness — without distracting yourself away from it.
But that’s the point. Awareness gives you the power to respond instead of react.
Even in uncomfortable moments, you’re still grounded in the truth of what’s happening — not in the stories your mind spins about it.
That’s what builds emotional resilience over time.
10. Let Boredom Be a Teacher
Boredom used to terrify me. I’d fill every quiet moment with noise — podcasts, scrolling, background TV.
But boredom is actually where creativity lives.
When your brain stops being overstimulated, it starts making connections and ideas on its own. Psychologists call this incubation — the mental space where creativity blooms.
Now I let myself be bored on purpose: walks without headphones, waiting in line without my phone, quiet drives.
That’s often when my best thoughts appear — because I finally gave them space.
11. Practice Gratitude in Real Time
Gratitude isn’t just about journaling at night. It’s about noticing joy as it’s happening.
I’ve started naming small things out loud throughout the day — sunlight on my floor, warm food, my partner laughing in another room.
It’s subtle, but it rewires your brain to notice goodness as it unfolds instead of only in retrospect.
Neuroscience backs this up: regular gratitude increases activity in the ventromedial prefrontal cortex, linked to long-term happiness and emotional balance.
Presence and gratitude feed each other. The more you practice one, the more naturally the other follows.
What Changed
Since I started practicing presence intentionally, my days feel slower — but in the best way. I still get things done. I just actually feel them as they happen.
My coffee doesn’t get cold anymore because I’m scrolling. My conversations feel deeper. My mind feels less like a web browser with 20 tabs open.
I still drift sometimes — everyone does. But I come back faster now.
If you want to start small, try this:
- Create a sensory anchor.
Turn an everyday cue (like scent or sound) into a mindfulness signal. I love using the ASAKUKI Essential Oil Diffuser with lavender or citrus to instantly reset my focus. - Read something that reminds you to slow down.
The Things You Can See Only When You Slow Down by Haemin Sunim is like a gentle reminder that you don’t have to escape your life to find calm — you just have to notice it.
Presence isn’t a destination; it’s a practice.
It’s the art of coming home to your life — over and over again.
